I felt sad one moment, happy the next, and vise-versa

Today has been one hell of a day. The morning went by in a flurry, because of all that went on. Someone had the nerve to make a hate-page for one of my classmates on Facebook, hack into their account and delete all their friends, trash their locker with hate-notes, and stole some of their science labs! I swear I will kill (okay maybe not kill, but I'll go evil on them) the person who did it. Not only is it mean, but isn't it illegal to steal labs that the state needs to see? Now one of my fellow students has to make up like, 7 freaking hours of labs! I know the classmate and I aren't BFFs or anything, but you just don't DO that! >:O
Now somehow I found a bright side to this day; the weather went from blah to yeah, the sun's still shining, it's warm (when I mean warm I mean warm for the fact it was raining like hell last night; and it was really cold out) out, and my dog's going psychotic because my silly parakeet decides after a whole year of not flying, she'll fly now that we have a dog, and really low. Sometimes I really wonder what goes on in those little brains of theirs.
Also, I gained half a pound! I'm half a step closer to legitimate freedom!

-Unknown Athena

Is there such thing as too nice?

I think I can be too nice at times. Is that a bad thing? My mom keeps saying it's bad, but I disagree. Maybe in the position I'm in it is, but I like to be nice. If a friend doesn't have much to eat for lunch, I gladly give my snack to them. Or if they need help studying, I'll give up my lunch period to help them. Everytime I do something nice that involves food, there's always this slight guilt feeling that keeps saying "You really needed the calories", and everytime I give, in a sense I loose because I'm "Giving up a chance to gain" as my nutritionist puts it. But really, I don't see the bad in helping others! Screw Darwinism, I like when everyone, not only the strongest, survive.

-Unknown Athena

P.S. I'm in school right now, so that's why I get to post right now. I'm so happy they didn't block blogspot!

Am I dreaming?

I think I'm loosing my mind, or have something wrong in my brain. I called, I e-mailed, I looked it up; and I'm not. I FREAKING WON SOMETHING! How is it possible? How is this not a scam?! Media class (so far) has been all about this stuff! Yet this time, it's real! I got some jewelry from JC (Juicy Couture), it says, and I need to fill out all these form-things. My life used to be in ruins, and now it's growing like a tree! (Photo from www.netstate.com)
And I have Japanese in a few minutes. Who can be depressed with great things like this?

-Unknown Athena

Question: What things in life make you really happy?

What Goes Around Comes Around...

This reminds me so much of last week's English class at school. My teacher asked us, "What really annoys you?" At first I answered the usual stuff, like arrogant people, judgmental people, homelessness, animal cruelty, etc. But now, I have a new one; people going to NYC when they are supposed to have an appointment with you. Grr. Moo. Ribbit. Meow. Bark. Waiting for half an hour just to realize the person you "need" (trust me, I could go without my therapist) isn't there is not my idea of fun. I'd rather eat full-fat ice cream of something!!! Actually I like ice cream, even if I get into my anorexic mind-set after, so maybe more like I'd rather work as a collage math teacher (I'm terrible at math. I have no idea how I got into advanced math)! Now, when that dumb therapist finds a time to "pencil me in", I'm too P/O'd to care. :|

-Unknown Athena

P.S. What annoys you most?

How do you handle it?

Besides recovering from anorexia, I'm also recovering from depression. Some people say that anorexia and depression go hand-in-hand, but I don't get that. It sounds like a terrible marriage to me!! Last night I had a "depression attack" I like to call it. It's when everything is fine until one thing upsets you and you take that sadness to a whole new level. When I had a depression attack, I slept, and stupidly skipped the Ensure. And when you have a huge headache to go with it, life does not feel great; so I stayed home from school today. I brushed my new family member, Delilah, finished my math project, and am now updating le blog. Delilah's the cutest, craziest little pup on the planet; to me. She's a little over a year old (her birthday's in November), and we got her over February break. I swear she's better at keeping down depression than my anti-depressions (which FYI, don't work!). Dogs just do that to you, I guess. They can be a pain in the boot, but they automatically become the love of your life! My mom keeps saying having a dog's like having a baby. Obviously, I can't relate to that (I'm only 13!!), but I love the unconditional love Delilah gives. She even loves my twin brother! How is that possible?!

-Unknown Athena

P.S. If you have "depression-attacks", how do you handle them?

Oh... It's you. Hey there, Ensure...

The one worst thing about gaining weight; Ensure, especially Ensure Plus. If you don't know what Ensure is (and be happy you DON'T have to take it), it's this smoothie-imitation that has a (fill in the blank)-load of vitamins, minerals, and my "good old friend" calories. My favorite flavor is probably vanilla, because the chocolate... It'll never taste like the real thing. And if you ever have to take this terrible excuse for a shake, don't try the strawberry. Supposedly it tastes like pepto-bismle (which I probably spelled SERIOUSLY wrong, but hey, we all have imperfections, right?), and I don't think downing 8 ounces of it would be a joy-ride. So take it from me, don't try this stuff.
Today I got a haircut, which was okay, if you like waiting for an hour to actually sit in the seat :|. Then I went home to cook some dinner; chicken stir-fry with Jasmine rice. My only real fear in the yummy dish was the fact that I added some sesame oil at the end to up the flavor. At first I was thinking of not eating it, but I remembered that isn't an option (thanks, mom), and I like rice. And DBT and CBT. I can't remember what they mean but it was some process in the hospital we [the patients] learned so we can work out problems. Thank the Gods that I'm free from it all! Actually, no, I'm not free. Yet :)

-Unknown Athena

I'm not a God... But I was at some point...

If I said my name, I'd die of embarrassment. So for now, I shall call myself Athena, after the Greek god of wisdom. She's like my ancient role-model; until I screwed up and became anorexic. After around 3 weeks in recovery, and 2 months in the "outside world" I still have the anorexic mindset lingering. So here I am, sharing my life with you, as I regain myself as the Unknown Athena.